She was always there, so close.
I never trusted the looks she gave me,
the feelings, thoughts, visions in my mind.
I saw her with others,
making them happy.
I wanted the same,
but I seemed so
different from them.
I couldn’t offer her
what they could.
Come As You Are, her favorite song.
I would pass by her house, that familiar riff,
tears streaming down my face.
She caught me peeking, smiled, waved.
I ran. Why not me, why not me.
I saw her with others,
making them miserable.
I didn’t want that at all.
One even committed
the ultimate sin.
Why would I want that?
Why did I need that?
She saved me from the world, from myself.
I guess that’s the trick to loving a girl like her.
You have to take the good with the bad,
you have to realize that she isn’t perfect,
but that’s what makes her perfect for this world.
I saw her with others,
doing what she did.
No right, no wrong,
just living.
Do you want that?
I made the move.
There was so much to learn at first.
I had become adept at being inept.
False insecurities and false facades
are what she helped me tear down first.
This will not do, she would say, smiling
all the way. I learned to trust in someone
that I never would have trusted before.
So in love, so in love!
The promises, the future,
it’s ours for the taking.
Never look back,
she tells me, so I don’t.
Not even a peek.
She now talks about crazy things that I never
would have thought I would be involved with.
The craziest is bringing another person
into our new coveted circle. I hole up, but she
reminds me of before. Why not? she says.
I’ll think about it, but let’s just keep
the honeymoon going for a bit longer please.
Finally in love!
Finally in love!
Finally in love!
Finally in love!
Finally in love!
Life has purpose, existence. A reason to live.
What else could be more important?
I wake up to see her beautiful face beside mine.
I wake up to a world with her in it, all the better now.
I wake up to her for the first time every time.
I woke up before it was too late.
God, do I love my life?
God do I love my Life!